Mega Python vs Gatoroid

Mega Python vs GatoroidNetflix IMDb
It’s another Asylum monster/pop star extravaganza, this time with both Debbie Gibson and Tiffany [last name unknown], as well as a Martinez. ‘Which Martinez?’ you ask? THE Martinez. And a host of pythons and alligators-that-look-more-like-crocodiles-to-me rise out of the Everglades to attack Florida, which I again write off as a total loss. (Seriously, America, we’re fully insured, right?)

There is pop music (some of which is pretty damn good), cars, and helicopters that change shape in mid-air. There’s a herpatologist who can fly a helicopter and an animal rights activist who cares passionately about releasing non-native predators into Florida swamps. Other highlights: swallowing, biting, shooting, and cleavage. Plus, a secret surprise I guarantee will surprise you with its secret!

I praise the acting (I think; it’s tough to remember all the crap I say, sometimes) but ding the directing (close-ups of people getting eaten is fundamentally cinematically different from people getting eaten).

Start the movie after the “The Asylum” title has faded out and the “Mega Python vs Gatoroid” title has just faded in over the airboats.

4 thoughts on “Mega Python vs Gatoroid”

  1. Finally got to listen. It was worth waiting for the fix.

    Could you get some kind of deal going with Asylum? Your commentary is the only thing that makes these things worth “watching” (in that I just listen to your commentary and then go to YouTube for the parts that make you yell out, “Oh my God!”).


  2. It actually would be great to get DVDs of some of their bigger releases. Honestly, I would do a commentary for any movie anyone actually sent me. (Are you listening, Scorsese?!)

    Over at the Committed blog, Inmate 977 (his name is H. Perry Horton, as it turns out) works at a big video store and so gets access to all the DVDs in advance of their release, which makes me slightly jealous of him (but only until I remember that I am an overpaid business consultant).

  3. Oh, and I’m trying to be more descriptive now. I know a lot of people are not watching the movie with me, especially these Asylum potboilers.

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